THE BEST PERSONAL STATEMENT I'VE EVER READ (Cambridge University Example)
Education
Introduction
Hey everyone, welcome back to the channel! My name is Shane, a recently qualified doctor and nurse, and currently a supervisor at Cambridge University. Today, I'm diving deep into analyzing my friend's personal statement as part of a personal statement course I'm developing on Scovia. This course is designed to help aspiring medical students with a structured framework for crafting their personal statements, and it'll be completely free with a two-month trial!
Analyzing the Personal Statement
My friend, S, is a recently qualified doctor from Cambridge University, and we've been friends for six years. He consistently ranks among the top three students in our university, so it's an honor to dive into his personal statement, which comprises approximately 620 words. Here's how the structure breaks down:
- Introduction: 25 words (4%)
- Work Experience: 55%
- Academia: 27%
- Extracurricular Activities: 7%
- Conclusion: 6%
The Introduction
The first paragraph sets the tone: “In medicine, I see a purposeful and versatile vocation, yet what I love most is its fusion of a scientific core with a philanthropic heart.” This introduction effectively communicates his motivation for pursuing medicine, blending academic interest with personal aspiration. The passionate language used here is crucial for standing out.
Work Experience
S seamlessly transitions into discussing his work experience at Dow University Hospital in Karachi, describing how it inspired a “resolute desire” to pursue medicine. This showcases his deep engagement with the field and his reflection on the challenges faced. He highlights meaningful moments, such as witnessing altruism from specialists, which reinforces his commitment to the medical profession.
He elaborates further on how his work experiences have taught him empathy and the importance of holistic care, stating: “I was captivated by the surgical precision in fixing the prosthesis.” Here, he reflects on the role of doctors, emphasizing their duty to the community, showcasing his understanding of public health.
Academia
In the academic section, S references Mukherjee's The Emperor of All Maladies and recounts an essay he won a science prize for. This highlights his engagement with the academic aspects of medicine beyond the regular curriculum—something that is highly valued by institutions like Oxford. He also discusses his initiative in studying further mathematics, underlining his analytical skills necessary for medical research.
Extracurricular Activities
S’s extracurricular section notes how music and tennis help him unwind while managing a demanding schedule, showcasing his multitasking abilities. He effectively compounds his activities to demonstrate his prioritization skills.
Conclusion
In the conclusion, he reflects on the challenges of medicine but affirms his motivation and capacity to succeed in this fulfilling vocation. This strikes a balance between realism about the demands and a passionate view of the rewards of being a doctor.
If you're seeking advice for writing your personal statement, check out the resources I provide in my upcoming personal statement master class on Scovia, where you can also sign up for a free guide.
Keywords
- Personal statement
- Cambridge University
- Work experience
- Academia
- Extracurricular activities
- Reflection
- Passion
- Community care
- Holistic care
- Supererogatory
FAQ
1. What is a personal statement?
A personal statement is a written description of your achievements, interests, and goals, which you submit as part of your application to universities.
2. Why is the structure important in a personal statement?
A clear structure helps to present information logically, making it easier for the reader to follow your journey and understand your motivations.
3. What should I include in the work experience section?
You should describe your relevant experiences, what you learned, how they shaped your understanding of medicine, and reflect on how they influenced your decision to pursue this path.
4. How can I demonstrate my passion for medicine?
Use enthusiastic language, provide specific examples from your life experiences, and reflect on what makes medicine meaningful to you.
5. Are extracurricular activities important in a personal statement?
Yes, they demonstrate your ability to balance different aspects of life, showcase your interests, and highlight key qualities like teamwork, leadership, and empathy.